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Name : Marie Zhong-Yi Ling
No Matric : 213898
Title of Essay : Heart of Love
As the rain poured down heavily that evening leading to a torrential downpour in the suburb residential area located in Kedah, Malaysia and making loud pitter-pattering noises on the roof of a cozy two-story semi-detached house, a young teenage girl of seventeen stood rigid and her face expressionless in her bedroom upstairs as she stared blankly out her window. She was a pretty young lady with perfect features- high cheekbones, rosy cheeks, fair skin, large hazel brown eyes and long dark wavy hair. Occasionally, she would flip back her raven black hair from her stiff shoulders and push back her bangs from her eyes in agitation as a gentle breeze blew her hair into her eyes. In addition to that, a certain chilliness seemed to cling perpetually to the airy room. Her bedroom really was comfy. Her bed was right beside her windows and she had a small colour TV set opposite her bed. Near the door was her study desk with a small ‘Apple’ branded laptop sitting on it.
Now, as she continued to gaze out at the cascading torrents of rain, her lips began to form into a thin hard straight line, colour began to flood her cheeks and angry tears began to blur her sight as she remembered that terrible fateful day. She angled her head and tilted her face slightly towards the overcast skies as she had done so many times before. It had rained heavily that evening as well. She could still remember the look on her dad’s face when he told her that her mother was gone. However, she couldn’t understand what he was trying to say. After all, she was only a 3 -year old kid at that time. She had thought that her mother would eventually come back someday. As time passed, she began to learn the truth. She had cried for days when she finally managed to grasp what her father had said to her all those years ago.
Elle Woods shook her head sadly and slowly lowered herself down on her bed near the windows. She cradled her head in her arms, trying to relive the gone memories that were once hers. It had happened so many years ago and yet, she could still remember it all so clearly as if it had only happened yesterday. She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ears as a gust of cool wind blew it into her eyes. It truly was a painful memory and how she wished that she could turn time back to when she still had a mother. She continued to listen to the sounds of the now subsiding rain. Hypnotic, indeed. Truth was, she had always loved the rain. She feels as though God is with her when it rains, because then, the whole world cries along with her. The heaven opens up and weeps with the child that she was.
“Elle, your mother’s dead and she won’t be coming back again, meaning forever. I need you to understand that,” her dad finally said when she persistently pestered him about her mother once she needed to know the truth. She could not stand her friends’ countless questions any longer. Some had even teased her saying she was motherless, some said that she was born under a bad moon and so they called her motherless Bad Luck Elle. But all that never affected her as much as when she witnessed her classmate’s mother lovingly hugging and kissing her daughter right in front of her very eyes. It struck a heavy blow to her heart. Their closeness had brought a sense of loneliness that she never cared quite as much about before. “What do you mean, daddy? No, I don’t believe you! That cannot be! Mummy is coming home soon, right? Please do say yes. Oh please daddy!!” she had whispered tearfully a faint tremor in her voice.
The rain had stopped. The evening sky darkened slightly. Night was starting to approach, at the horizon, Elle could see wild birds flying back to their nests. Elle’s dark eyes swept across the sullen-looking garden. Her eyes stopped, transfixed on a tree. It was just an ordinary tree in the garden, was it not? Elle furrowed her brow, remembering that there used to be a swing under that particular tree. Dad had made it. Together, they would stand around it laughing and chatting happily away. Mother would sing lovely songs to her. Dad would push her on the swing, higher and higher still until she begged him to stop. Then grandmother would hug and kiss her lovingly on both cheeks. Everyone treated her like a princess. After all, she was an only child and so, she was showered with lots of love. Those were the happy times. Now, everything had changed. She sighed deeply. She desperately wanted those sweet memories back. Even the spectacle of the lovely beds of roses that lined the green field seemed grey in the dying light. A soft moaning of wind chilled her soul. She shivered slightly. She could not help but feel like a caged bird, one with a broken wing at that. She doubted that she could even fly out to embrace freedom, if she were given the chance. Was that not a tad too pitiful for words? Her mind drifted on...
When Elle realised what had happened, she was so shaken that she changed completely. She was no longer the talkative, intelligent and happy-go-lucky girl that everyone once knew. She became quiet and hostile towards everyone who tried to talk to her. She became too detached from her surroundings or maybe too reserved. Her father tried to comfort and console her but she knew that her father was very much affected by the tragic incident as well. She could still remember the day when she walked pass her father’s opened bedroom door. She felt curious when she heard muffled sobs coming from behind the door. When she peeped in, she saw tears rolling down her father’s cheeks as he knelt beside his bed holding a photo album full of her mother’s pictures. Her father never knew that she saw him crying. After that, Elle learnt that her father was also in terrible pain and her heart bled even more. Elle couldn’t do much to help her father either at that time knowing that she herself was hurting too. But she knew that they would manage to get over it someday. She sighed and lay down on her queen-sized bed.
She was right. But her father got over it a whole lot faster than she expected him to. He was starstruck as soon as he met the beautiful charming lady at his workplace. When her father arranged Elle and his fiancee to meet, she immediately disapproved. The woman who captured her dad’s heart was indeed strikingly beautiful but she had a selfish heart. The self-centered woman had terrible plans. She warned Elle to stay away from her father’s life once she had married him. She also threatened to persuade Elle’s father to move to New York City with her as soon as they tied the knot. Needless to say, she was confident that Elle’s father would choose her over his small worthless daughter. She was dead set on keeping Elle and her father apart. She did not want all of his attention to be focused on Elle and not her. Her hatred towards Elle grew stronger when their discussions were always about his worries for Elle.
“Elle... Elle!!” a feeble voice she knew so well rang in her ears. She came back to earth. She had been reminiscing about the ghosts of her past and was so lost and caught up in her own world that she had totally forgotten about her surroundings. When she came back to reality, she noticed that her eyes were flooding and spilling over with tears, as usual. She always cried whenever she thought about all those sad memories. She had tried to put it all behind her and continue on with her life but she just couldn’t seem to do it no matter how hard she tried. She wasn’t strong enough. She wished that she could lock all of the sad memories in a box, lock it with a golden key and put the treasured box away. “Elle, Elle... Are you alright, dear?” her worried old grandmother asked anxiously. She wasn’t surprised as this was a normal thing since Elle started staying with her after her son, Elle’s father left to New York City with his newly wed wife. She sighed in pity and sorrow as she recalled Elle’s expression when her dad left her. She didn’t blame her son entirely. It wasn’t his fault if he wanted to be happy. And, he had asked Elle to go with him but Elle absolutely refused. Later on, she found out that Elle chose to stay because she did not want to disturb her father’s newfound happiness. She knew that Elle loved her father very much and did not want to be a burden to her father and stepmother. She preferred to stay with someone she knew and so, Elle’s father brought Elle to her house. At first, it had been hard for Elle to adjust to the new surroundings without her beloved father, whom she had grown to depend and rely on. She also knew that Elle’s mother had passed away not long before that and everything that had happened must have led her into depression.
“Poor girl, she has lost so much and at such a young age too,” she thought sadly, shaking her head thoughtfully as she gazed wistfully at Elle’s forlorn but dazed state. Then, she shook her head again as she remembered that Elle’s father did call and send letters to Elle often at first, but slowly, the phone calls, e-mails, postcards and letters became scarce and slowly faded away into nothingness. Elle never heard from him again and neither did she. However, Elle’s father still took responsibility in paying for Elle’s expenses. The money still came but the person sending it couldn’t be traced. She had often wondered, what had made her once filial and dutiful son change so drastically. “Perhaps he is too busy with his own life to care about his old mother and young daughter here. And of course, his duties and obligations towards his new wife,” she wondered. “Oh, grandma! I’m so sorry! I didn’t see you there for a moment,”she heard Elle’s surprised voice. “It’s ok, Elle. Of course you did not see me. I just came in!” she lied and patted Elle’s shoulder gently and reassuring, “Are you okay, dear? I am worried for you. You haven’t eaten yet. Come, let us go down now and have some dinner,”she continued. Elle just simply nodded her head. Taking one last glance out the window at the dark moonless sky without even a single bright shining star in sight, she slid the curtains shut, closed her bedroom door and silently followed her grandmother down the stairs.
The next morning, Elle awoke with puffy eyes and a throbbing headache. As she not so gently massaged her temples, she tried to recall what had caused it. She had slept late the past night, lying awake until the wee hours of the morning- thinking. She wondered what would it be like to step into university for the first time. She wondered if she could just ignore people as easily as high school. She hoped that everyone would just mind their own business and forget her existence. Act as if Elle Woods were invisible. “That would be just fine. I wouldn’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not,” Elle thought hopefully. After that, she went into an emotional breakdown and had cried herself to sleep. Now, as she got ready for her first day at Northern University all her thoughts came rushing back to her. She calmed herself down, said goodbye to her grandmother and stepped out closing the door behind her.
As she hastily ran up the front steps of Northern University taking two steps at a time, she told herself that she simply must save up for a new car. The bus she had taken that morning was late and as a result, she got caught in heavy traffic down Kingswood Road. “Jeez, and on my first day too! How unlucky,” she groaned for the forth time. Luckily, she was an organized person and had taken the liberty of collecting her class schedule and locker key beforehand. She glanced at the schedule she held in her right hand. She had taken the liberty of checking out the list of extra subjects the university had to offer as well. After running through the list, she had made up her mind to take up a continue-ed class and although she knew that she was not Miss Academic Achiever, history had always managed to interest and fascinate her. She just loved the curiosity building up inside her each time she thought of all the wars happening around the globe and of how they had started in the first place. She was running late for her first class, ‘History Of Wars’. As she rushed through the door into the open hallway, her eyes fully focused on her schedule, she rammed headfirst into a solid wall. Her books flew from her hands and crashed to the floor. “Oww!” she gave a cry of pain and rubbed her head. When she finally glanced up, she was shocked to discover that it wasn’t a wall she had slammed into. The stranger she had just crashed into shrugged his black ‘Guess’ jacket back over his shoulders and straightened up. She blinked. The guy was gorgeous. Dark hair swept back from a high forehead, then tumbled down just far enough to flirt with his shirt collar. His mouth was a study in contrasts, somehow managing to be thin and sensuous all at the same time.
His clothes kept the contrast going: a sleek black jacket topped with a pair of dark faded jeans and a white linen shirt. The whole effect reminded Elle of a romantic poet. But it was his eyes that really had Elle’s pulse hopping up and down like a kindergartner on Christmas morning. They were a deep mesmerizing blue, like the waters of Lake Tahoe. She stood there staring open-mouthed at him until he cleared his throat loudly. She quickly pressed her lips firmly together and blushed when she realised that she had been staring for a moment too long. “He’s probably some nasty, arrogant, egoistic, big-headed playboy judging by those looks. He does have to-die-for killer looks but other than that he is just a total stranger! I would never fall for a guy with such boyish looks no matter how good-looking he is,” she thought and sniffed in dislike. She straightened her back, squared her shoulders and tried to look dignified. “Idiot,” she mumbled angrily under her breath and bent down to gather her scattered about books and papers together. The guy played the part of a perfect gentleman by not commenting on Elle’s rudeness and instead helped to collect some of her belongings strewn far away. However, Elle refused to acknowledge that. She just quickly snatched them back and rushed off without even breathing a single word. As she stopped by her locker, #109, to drop off some of the books and ease her of the heavy burden, the bell rang loudly indicating that class was going to start any minute and that Elle was going to be late if she didn’t hurry up.
As Elle stepped up to a closed blue door marked ‘Class A- History’, she swallowed hard, took a deep breath and gave the door a swift push. The door swung open easily and she found herself face to face with her new lecturer. She glanced surreptiously at the yellow nametag pinned on his lapel that read ‘Professor Graham’ and forced herself to meet his sharp gaze. Her new lecturer was smiling what seemed like a friendly welcoming grin and his eyes twinkling with sincerity. He glanced down briefly at the namelist he held in his left hand and smiled again when he found what he was looking for. “Well, well, well Miss Woods. It is definitely a pleasure to have you here in our class. Please take any empty seat,” Professor Graham said waving his empty right hand around. Elle glanced around the packed room and looked at her lecturer again with raised eyebrows. “Oh, I’m afraid that there is only one unoccupied seat left next to Mr Parker there. Feel free to accomodate that seat,” he said, gesturing to the only empty seat left at the middle front row.
As Elle made her way to her respective seat, she blinked in confusion as she noticed the person sitting in the seat next her’s. “Mr Parker, the lecturer had said earlier,” Elle recalled. The person gave her an engaging smile as she climbed into her seat. Elle eyed him warily and then blinked again. This time not in confusion, but in shock. It was the same guy she had practically thrown herself at earlier that morning!! Those same heart-stopping jewel blue eyes suddenly sparkled and shone a little more blue, something Elle would have sworn was absolutely impossible as his face showed sudden recognition. His pearly white teeth shone in the light as he grinned widely. She bristled and stiffened as she remembered that embarassing encounter. As she took out her notebook and laid it on her desk, she nearly jumped at the professor’s sudden booming voice, “Well, Miss Woods, before you arrived, I was telling the class that we would be doing a little project which consists of 70% of your midterm test. You may do research on any topic you wish. Your partner would conveniently be the person sitting right beside you, and as for homework, please copy down the title of the essay now,” he instructed the whole class. He paused for a moment, fumbling in the chalk tray. Professor Graham was a man with a deep dramatic voice. He was tall with a shock of wild gray hair. Elle guessed that he might be in his forties. After managing to fill the air with an astonishing amount of chalk dust, he finally found an actual piece and began writing on the board behind him. He was definitely chalk-challenged, Elle thought, but he was also the best teacher she’d ever had. “Now,” Professor Graham said, rubbing his hands together, and revealing what he had written: ‘The History Of The Persian Wars.’ “I would like all of your assignments to be typed out and handed in by the end of the week.” As Professor Graham continued to explain about how the Persian Wars began, suddenly the guy sitting next to her turned to face her and holding out a hand, he said,” Hi, I’m William. William Parker. I guess we’ll be partners for the next few weeks. By the way, what’s your name?” Unfortunately for him, just as he finished speaking, the bell rang and everyone filed out of the room. Elle just ignored him, collected her notebook and walked away, leaving William as he gaped openly at her in astonishment and surprise.
With slumped shoulders and heavy-lidded eyes, Elle sat at her study table typing out the assignments given for the day. Once in a while, she would stretch out languidly and lean against her chair sighing tiredly. She was exhausted. It was her first day at university and she hadn’t been really prepared to face it. Now, she had hell to pay. She eyed the stack of papers she had to complete. It seemed to grow thicker each time she glanced at it. “Forget about having a nice sleep tonight, Elle,” she told herself and sighed heavily as she processed that thought. She continued to type slowly, her fingers numbing and her shoulders stiffening. Her determination shattered as her shoulders slumped forward, her eyes slid shut and her head drooped down into her limp, waiting arms.
Elle looked around her. It seemed to be misty and foggy everywhere. It was too dark to see any further. Elle waited for her eyes to adjust to the darkness as her pupils dilated. Somehow, it still seemed too dark to see anything. Elle tried to feel her way about and extended her hands to grope for something. Anything. Her shaky legs seemed to move on their own accord. As she moved forward, suddenly she saw a bright light ahead. She ran forward eagerly and saw ahead her mother illuminated in the brightness. However, as she stepped closer, her mother seemed to drift farther away. “Wait for me mummy! I want to come with you! Wait!” she screamed frantically as they began to drift further apart. Her mother just smiled and stretched out one slender hand. Elle stretched her’s out but as their fingers nearly touched, suddenly they were pulled in opposite directions by a strong force.
“No!!!!! Mummy!!!!!” Elle woke up screaming loudly, beads of perspiration and sweat trickling down her damp forehead combining with the salty tears that flowed down her tear-stained cheeks. Slowly, her breathing returned to normal and her heartbeat slowed into a regular pattern. “Oh, what could that dream possibly mean?” she thought to herself. She missed her mother but somehow that dream seemed a little too real. Oh, how she wished she could be wherever her mother was. But she knew that it was impossible. Elle continued on with her heap of assignments when she realised that it was getting late and she hadn’t even completed one.
Morning came fast. Elle got ready for her second day at Northern University. Her bus came earlier than she had expected and so, as a result, she managed to reach campus early. As she walked through the rather crowded hallway and headed straight for her locker at the end, she indistinctly heard her name being called. She glanced around in apprehension as the voice became more pronounced and felt herself stiffen when she finally recognized the owner of that deep husky male voice that was heading towards her direction right that moment. Yesterday, she had tried her best to avoid him but today she couldn’t try that technique now since she was cornered by rows of lockers. Her back was already pressed against the hard granite wall. Her only means of escape was to move forward which was also the direction of the incoming intruder. She balled her fists and stood silently as he approached. “Hey there, I was really hoping to see you before class today. I’m afraid I didn’t get to introduce myself properly yesterday. I’m William Parker. And you are...?” William introduced himself holding out his hand for the second time. The first time he held out his hand was yesterday during ‘History Of Wars’ class and Elle had deliberately pretended not to hear him.
This time, however, Elle couldn’t pretend to not hear him when he had spoken loud and clear, his voice full of confidence. She looked sideways towards the hallway, now with less people, and felt her face burn with embarassment as some girls were openly ogling William and trying to catch his attention which was now focused fully on Elle. She turned her gaze back to his outstretched hand. Then, mustering up all the courage she had, she fixed him with a cold, unfriendly glare. “Whoa, whoa! Calm down. I’m not going to eat you,” he laughed putting up both hands in mock surrender but quickly his expression sombered and the twinkle in his eyes faded abruptly as he took in Elle’s stony hard expression and balled up fists. “I don’t understand why you hate me so much but I think that we have to at the very least be able to see eye to eye if we want to complete the ‘free topic’ project by deadline. I think we’re given 3 weeks,” he said cocking his head to one side and smiled a crooked grin. Elle’s heart melted. “Alright. We’ll each do our part and then maybe we could like, combine our resources or something,” she said calmly. “I agree. But first, we’ve got to decide on a topic. I was thinking about going into the World War 1 and 2 in detail. What do you have in mind?” William asked. Just then, the bell rang loudly, making both of them jump. “Erm, I haven’t given that much thought so far but your idea sounds great. Sorry, I’m late for class. See you in ‘History Of Wars’ later then,” Elle brushed past William avoiding his piercing stare. “Ok! Oh, and sorry about that unfortunate incident yesterday morning,” he called after her, grinning cheerfully as she ran off and disappeared into the crowd of people.
She slumped, exhausted, onto the couch and collapsed as her legs gave way. She lay there for a while listening for sounds of her grandmother cooking of walking about. But, there was nothing. It was unusually quiet. “That’s strange,” thought Elle. She got up and walked to the kitchen. No one was there. “Grandma? I’m home! Where are you?” her voice echoing throughout the empty house. Elle rushed up the stairs. Her legs felt shaky and a chill ran down her spine as she pushed open her grandmother’s bedroom door slowly. She could feel something bad was going to happen. She closed her eyes and taking a deep breath, opened them slowly.
Her grandmother was sleeping. Elle exhaled in relief. But the horror wasn’t over yet. As she went closer, she noticed that her grandmother’s still chest was unmoving and her face was pale. She looked deathly pale and too pallid to be alive. Her head had lolled to one side and her body looked limp. Elle stood staring blankly at her grandmother’s dead face and let out a long, loud, high-pitched wail. “Nooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!” Elle’s piercing cry rang throughout the house and she never wanted it to stop.
Elle looked out the windows as she sat on her bed, thinking. It had been a week since her grandmother’s death due to old age. She was alone now and she had no one at all. She felt cold and distant as she sank deeper into depression. She felt as if she was cursed because once she had started loving someone, the person would eventually leave her. Elle vowed never to love again. It just hurt too much. But this time, it didn’t hurt as much as before. She had grown so used to everyone leaving her that her body numbed the pain. Sometimes, she did feel as if her heart was bleeding and her whole world was falling apart but soon after that the loneliness came and that was worse than anything else. She picked up the photo frame on her bedside table. It was one of the many pictures that she had taken with her family many years ago. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from the picture. As she gazed at the happy smiles plastered on the faces, teardrops fell from her eyes onto the glassy surface. She bit her lip and supressed the sobs and wails starting to emanate from her. A bolt of lightning flashed across the horizon. Her dark eyes flashed upward towards the sky. Moonlight glanced off the windows of the darkened room. Little stars twinkled faintly in the deep blue of the night sky. The light gleams for an instant, and then it's night once more. Elle looked at the photo once more and laid the frame facedown on the bedside table. She couldn’t bear to look at it. Elle vowed never to love again.
“Elle, Elle!! Wait up! Hey!” a voice shouted after her. Elle quickly threw her half eaten lunch into the bins and walked towards the nature club’s garden. She found an empty bench and slid into it gratefully, crossing her legs. She was thankful that she didn’t have to talk face-to-face with William that day. She didn’t want to talk to anyone at all. She didn’t want to get hurt again. Footsteps advanced towards her and stopped in front of her. Slowly, she lifted her gaze from the pair of black Nike shoes to the frowning face of William Parker. Her heart beat erratically. She didn’t know why, but he seemed to have that effect on her all the time. William just stood there looking down at her. Two minutes had passed. Finally Elle broke the silence. “Go away. Stop invading my space,” she said passively, her voice devoid of any emotion. “You know what your problem is? You’re being all miserable and pathetic and all you care about is yourself! I don’t understand what’s wrong with you Elle! You haven’t been yourself since last week. How long are you going to stay this way? Forever? Grow up, Elle!” William finally replied, his blue eyes regarding her coldly. Elle stood up and lashed out in fury, “What do you know about life, William Parker? You and your little perfect life. I bet you haven’t gone through half as much as what I’ve been through. Guess what? Life sucks! Of course you don’t understand anything about me! You don’t even know me, so, stop TRYING!” As Elle tried to run away, William shouted back, “I may not know everything about you, but I know that you’re a phony, a hypocrite! And, you’re lying to yourself.” Elle stomped off angrily and never looked back as the garden door closed behind her.
She flung her backpack down angrily on the bed. Tears stung her eyes as she remembered what had happened that morning. William’s cruel and hurtful remarks came back ringing in her ears. Elle couldn’t understand. Was it her fault if she wanted to protect herself and others from pain and suffering? Was it? She wasn’t cruel, was she? “No! William must be lying! I just don’t want anyone to get hurt, because in the end it is I who would hurt most,” she murmured softly to herself. No, she wouldn’t cry over that boy! She had cried enough and she didn’t want to get hurt by someone again. She blinked back her tears, gritted her teeth and steeled herself. She had to be strong and go through it alone. She picked up her mp3 player and put the earpieces into her ears. The song seemed to tranquilize her thoughts and she slowly calmed down.
The next day, Elle didn’t see William Parker anywhere. He wasn’t in ‘History Of Wars’ class nor in the cafetaria. “He’s probably absent. I don’t care anyway,” she mumbled to herself as she walked down the hall towards her last class. Suddenly William appeared in front of her. “I need to tell you something important. After you hear what I’ve got to say and you still hate me, then I won’t disturb you anymore,” he said urgently. Elle decided to hear what he’s got to say. “It won’t hurt to just listen for a while. And I would definitely skip that boring ‘Computer Management’ class for anything,” she thought as she followed William to the garden where they had been at loggerheads with each other.
William turned to face her and taking a deep breath began the conversation. “ Elle, I’m really sorry about what I said to you yesterday and I realise that I launched into a bunch of accusations and made up a whole lot of conclusions before asking you what’s really wrong. I know it’s not my beeswax to know what’s going on with you and how come you’ve changed so much, but I really want to help you as a friend, Elle. Tell me, please?” he asked his expression full of love and concern for a friend. Elle stared at him speechless for a while. She was touched by his sincerity and willingness to help. “William, thanks for your support. I’m sorry about what happened yesterday as well. And I truly forgive you. Well, actually my grandmother just died last week. And now, I’ve got no one. I’m all alone in this world. And there’s nothing you or I can do to change that. But I am really grateful for your willingness to help but there’s really nothing we can do.” Elle shook her head sadly. “Don’t give up all hope, Elle. How about your parents? Surely they can help relieve your sadness?” William questioned. Elle replied, “No, my mother had died a long time ago, since I was a kid. And my father remarried and went to New York City with his newly-wedded wife. He left me with grandma. At first, he did contact me but after a while he just faded away into nothing. I have no idea of his whereabouts, let alone anything about him.”
William patted her shoulder comfortingly, trying to soothe the pain she felt by bringing back all the memories that had haunted her all these years. “How about you, William? Do you have a family of your own?” Elle asked him. “Yes, I do. I have a happy family. But both of my parents died after I was born. Car crash, they told me. I stayed with a foster family. They were really kind-hearted to adopt me. Apart from them, I have no one,” William told her and smiled sadly. Elle was appalled. She never thought that there could be someone going through such bitterness too. “So, you never got to experience your real parents’ love?” she asked. “Nope. In fact, I never even got to see them,” William murmured, his face downcast. Elle felt sorry for him. She finally knew that there were people going through worse fate than her. At least she had experienced her real parents’ love before they had left her. And she had gotten a chance to love her grandmother before she died too. At least she didn’t have to live with any guilt for not seeing her grandmother before she died. Elle knew that her grandmother was with her mother, together in heaven. “Elle, don’t worry about me. I’m fine. After all, people say that u won’t miss those you don’t meet so I really didn’t suffer much loss,” William continued and reached out a hand to her. She smiled and looked at William through her thick lashes as they joined hands and held on tightly, never wanting to let go.
Elle laughed freely, something she hadn’t done in years. As she was about to lie down on her warm, inviting bed, she turned her head ever so slightly as light caught on something lying on her bedside table. She glanced over and picked up the rectangular glass photo frame that was laid face down. She trailed her fingers lovingly across the glass surface. She still missed them but she knew that life had to go on. “Mother, I love you and I hope you are happy there. Father, I love you as well and I hope you’re happy wherever you are. I just hope you remember me,” she whispered softly as she blinked back silent tears of celestial happiness and forgiveness. She could just glimpse her mother smiling and nodding as if agreeing with her decision to step forward and never look back. She could finally lock up that treasured box and put away the golden key. She had finally come home to where she truly belonged and learnt to love again. She knew that she would never ever run away from her past. She had weathered three of the emotional phases people usually experience in the aftermath of tragedy: denial, anger, and acceptance. Now, Elle was certain that she had finally gotten past them all. She had finally managed to challenge the biggest change in her life instead of being afraid and holding back. As she set the frame back upright on the bedside table she glimpsed someone very familiar, a shadow, felt a close, familiar presence and a sense of belonging, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. And as sudden as a gust of wind blew across, the figure disappeared. But she continued to stare fixedly at the now empty spot, unable to look away. When she finally managed to tear her eyes away an almost impossible thought touched her mind as light as a feather but she quickly brushed it away. she climbed back into her warm bed, and as her head touched her pillow, her eyelids gradually grew heavier and heavier and finally sleep was inevitable. She finally succumbed to the multiple waves of sleepiness that washed over her and drifted into a deep, dreamless sleep.
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